its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
