It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize