That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize