what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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