i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
This is classic penis vs brain.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
