I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
