Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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