after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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