I wish I could teleport
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
