normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Randomize
