there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize