the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
