I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Randomize
