Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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