Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Randomize
