Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm so fucking centered right now
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
