you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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