Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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