Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
