i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
