If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
