i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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