I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
