We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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