If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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