That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
