Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize