Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
