I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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