:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
