all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I want you more than these girls want KFC
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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