Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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