where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
grandma shit on top of the toilet
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
