we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
