you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
