My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
