Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
