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Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize