please come you make the beer taste better
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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