I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
