I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
