Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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