I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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