The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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