i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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