just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
