Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Randomize
