yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize
