I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize