i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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