Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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