awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
