we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
